There are very few topics that are difficult to talk about when it comes to children, but death is always up there as one of the hardest ones to discuss. Every child’s experience of death or loss is very different, but there are some best practices that you can follow to make these conversations a little easier. It’s not that you want to spring it out of the blue on your kids, but sometimes you have to bring up the discussion of somebody close to you dying or a pet dying.
It’s not a particularly nice conversation to have, but helping children understand the process of death and Funeral services and what it all means can help them feel more encouraged when something like this happens. It’s always a good idea to be open and honest, and if your children are asking questions about death, as long as they are old enough to hear the answer in an age-appropriate way, they should be answered and they do deserve that. So here are the following tips that you need to talk to children about death.
Be an active listener
Listening to your child will always be helpful, but you need to listen actively. Use phrases to tell them that you are listening carefully, like telling them that you can hear them and asking them to tell you more. You want to hear about their worries and you want to hear about what they have to say about a death, and this can help them to feel reassured that you understand where they are coming from.
Don’t fill the silences
If you ask a child too many questions, they will go quiet. The feeling of becoming overwhelmed and not knowing what the right answer is is often hard. By giving children time to think things through, their questions will come to them, and they’ll also feel more comfortable with the conversation when they’re the ones leading it. Breaking the news that a pet or a loved one has died is never going to be easy on you either. But don’t fill up the silences with mindless chatter. Give them a chance to process.
Don’t hide your own emotions
Children are often better at handling the truth of a situation than we are. If you have lost a parent a sibling or a friend, you’re going to have to break that news to your child. And that’s very difficult emotionally for you to have to do when you know that you are in the midst of your grief. It’s OK to cry and it’s OK to show them your emotions because grief is a very natural emotion that your children will be experiencing at some stage.
Encourage sharing
With the help of open-ended questions, you can encourage your children to share their own feelings. Don’t take over the conversation or avoid the conversation about death. Ask them what they think about it and what they feel about it. Ask them what they believe happens during the process of dying and what happens next. It’s important for them to have their views and for you to hear them.
